Category Archives: My Diary

God Give Me Strength

God please give me the strength to get through all this. You know the struggles I have to face. The ups and down along the way..

I know I am so0 blessed by everything I have…

I am trying so0 hard to be strong and take care of everything and everyone but I am just not there yet… so0 much is out of control and so0 many challenges.
You have helped me heal in soo many ways, but I need more strength to get through all that is going on right now…
As I close my eyes, I’m trying to feel your strength. I do believe that you won’t ever let me down V.V

I whispered to myself, that you’re here with me,  and will carry me through it. Ameen!

Completely Alone

Have you ever had to get through a day, smiling at people, talking.

As if everything were normal and okay,

while all the time you felt like you were carrying a leaden weight of unhappiness inside you.

——-I’m sick and tired of trying to hide the mess that I am——-

I Can’t Erase You

Too many memories I can’t erase
like it haunts me , follows me around
I try shaking it off , but it persists
waking me up at 2AM each day
perhaps I am destined to remember things

as they were for me to suffer

to see the truth as I should
reminding of the castle I built with sand

now covered by a dark mist of dreams
that I should forget.

But perhaps it is love that awakens me
longing for the pain to leave

all I know is , there was once you
who I still love with all my heart
and of the memories that I must forget.
Neither happiness of love will endure
without the test of fire which
only tears can extinguish..

it seems almost a lifetime of sadness
from sleepless nights
to the breaking of the dawn
I only hope that the happiness you found
will always keep your own heart beating
with a longing for a love that truly endures,
for me it will always be a realization
that only wordless verses
can explain and only death will erase.

” Erasing yourself from somebody’s life
is not as simple as walking out the door “

I Love That Name

Did you notice that Vettel always wears a different helmet in each race?
He has a certain design for each race in this season, including for Turkish GP, this evening…
But how I was surprised after just checking his official website, and found this picture.
There written “Fatima’s Eye”… Absolutely that’s a cool design! I think it’s much better than the previous one, for Chinese GP three weeks ago. But I was wondering why they named his helmet like that? Honestly, somehow I feel pretty proud just because I think that helmet’s name has a resemblance with my name… mrgreen :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

However, I would like to congratulate him, for his victory today…
Excellent! Congratz Vettel !!! ^^,
I know you can do it well..
Yesterday you got a pole and today you finished it perfectly ^^b
Keep it up! Go German Go00000

Can’t Wait To Get The Season Started

With just four days to go until the first Grand Prix of this new season, now I just can’t wait to see the premier Grand Prix of 2011 F1 Season in Albert Park Circuit, Melbourne, Australia………… ^^

Hope it’ll be a great season to our Lovely Mercedes GP Team and especially to my beloved Hero, Michael Schumacher……… 🙂
God, please save him through all this season and give him so many.. many victories…. mrgreen :mrgreen:
So that he can win his 8th world championship title… 😀

Ferrari celebrate the final race for Michael Schumacher (GER) Ferrari. F1 World Championship, Brazilian Grand Prix, Race, Interlagos, Brazil, 22 October 2006

Schumi, We all trust you as usual honey… I know you can do it, just do your best at this season… as I pray for you, and you’ll still always in my prayer forever.
With big Ross behind you.. I still believe that you two can make a great team as good as Ferrari when you’re still there with uncle Todt… Actually everytime I remember all that things in the past… I can’t believe what I face now that all things has been changed like this. How I miss you all (Schumi-Brawn-Todt), when you three still in the legendary prancing horse… How I miss you standing on the top podium. As you stood on the podium,the German anthem played-followed by the Italian anthem(The best anthem combination I’ve ever heard), got the trophy, then spraying the champagne… What a beautiful day for me… ^^
I miss your victory leap and obviously your sweetest smile… : )
I really miss every single moment of your winning celebration… Wish I could go back to that time… :’)
To be honest, I still feel like Maranello is your home, all the former crews are your family… And I do feel Ferrari is still where you belong. I don’t know why, Ferrari is still like a family too for me.. even now when you’re no longer exist.

Schumi with Ross

It’s hard for me to accept your decision at that time, that you’re going to leave Maranello. how could it be… But you know I always support your decision, including the decision to comeback with Mercedes GP instead of with Ferrari(But I feel a little bad honestly). At least there was Ross who accompany you there.
Very different indeed, now I have to turn away from Ferrari to Mercedes Gp, from Maranello, Italy to Brackley, UK. Hmmmm, that’s not easy to let your red car in Ferrari now driven by another driver 😥 BTW I miss the Tifosi too…
But it doesn’t mean that I don’t like his current team anyway. Absolutely I love Mercedes GP as much as I love Ferrari. I love wherever he is, That’s the point. 😀

To Mercedes GP: Thank you so00 much for your effort and all of the hard work for building and developing MGP W02 over the winter… Don’t stop to improve the car and build a fast, comfort and reliable car for him… knowing your developments for the new year makes me confident that you can fight for some race victories from your own power. This is a prospect which makes me look forward that you’re ready to compete again on the top level of this sport.
This is exactly what I want at this period of time.

I can’t wait already to get the new season started^^.
After all, I “really” miss seeing him on the podium.
Good luck honey.. May God always be with you as usual… Ameen!

Hanya Ingin Damai

Aq hanya ingin damai.. di hati Qh..

Apakah itu terlalu berlebihan untuk sebuah doa?

Q terus coba dan mencoba… untuk ikhlaskan semuanya, yahhh.. SEMUANYA!
Sungguh kehilangan mu, ternyata jauh lebih berat dari yang pernah Q bayangkan…
Detik, menit, jam, hari, minggu dan bulan serasa berjalan amat sangat lambat ..
Entah sampai kapan Tuhan ijinkan semua sakit dan perih ini bersemayam di hati Qh?
Q coba tersenyum walau sesungguhnya, tak pernah ada senyum lagi di hati Qh.
Entah sampai kapan hari-hari Q begitu gelap seperti detik ini….

Kadang Q ingin kehilangan semua kenangan itu..
Agar Q bisa dapatkan kembali damai hati Qh..
Tapi sungguh hati Q tak pernah rela untuk kehilangan semua kenangan itu, setelah Q harus terima kenyataan kau bukan lagi milik Q yang dulu…
Q rasa, hanya itu yang Q punya dari mu. Satu-satunya milik Qh..

Aq tahu, Q harus selalu ikhlas atas semuanya.
Seberapapun perihnya, sakitnya, Q kan terus coba mensyukuri segalanya. Mencoba ikhlas akan semua ketetapan langit yang telah Tuhan berikan dalam hidup Qh… (v_v)

Tuhan masih beri Aq kesempatan hidup. Hidup untuk mencintaimu… :’)

Untuk Mu Disana

Bila memang semuanya mesti berakhir, ku harap dapat berakhir dengan indah. Sesuatu yang telah pergi takkan mungkin kembali, namun yang pergi akan berganti dengan sebuah balasan yang indah. Biarlah semuanya menjauh dan pergi, namun ku harap kau akan selalu ada untuk bisa tetap ku kenang… dalam hati dan setiap doa ku.

Pergilah dengan tenang tanpa ada tangis dan air mata, kehadiran mu selama ini telah ajarkan aku banyak hal tentang hidup dan cinta. Malaikat ku yang tak bersayap itu kini telah pergi tanpa kata selamat tinggal, namun kepergiannya telah musnahkan penderitaan ku yang selama ini ku rasakan, entah sejauh mana aku dapat bertahan untuk hidup tanpa dia. Tuhan.. bila masih ada waktu untuk ku jatuh cinta lagi, biarlah aku dapat menemukan sesosok malaikat seperti dia, meskipun takkan pernah lagi dapat ku temui sesosok keindahan yang sama dalam kenyataan. Pergilah malaikat ku, semoga Tuhan selalu memeluk mu dalam kasih sayang Nya yang tanpa batas. Di bawah bintang hidup ku, aku selalu berdoa dan tersenyum untuk mu disana……..

Our Life Has Been Fated

What happened in this life ,

has been fated
has been written in a big paper

That we don’t know
Till it’s happening to us
It’s completely like a puzzle
yeahh…. a big puzzle

The biggest puzzle in this world is our own life

It’s Time To Let Go… ( It’ll be OK )

For a heart that’s torn, there’s not much you can do but understand. There’s no easy way to let go of someone that you know will never be yours again. I am aware that time will come that I need to give you up. You left me at the very moment that I can’t even say the words goodbye . I cry for the pain, the moments shared, and the times I thought I’ll have you forever. I know you’re not mine to keep but holding on to your words became my way to keep me going. Wish you saw my tears… Cause it spells the truth about how I really feel inside. My tears explains the pain when you decided to leave ..and the pain of not having you back.  Smile and laughter can’t even cover up the PAIN.. Till this very day, I am still picking up the broken pieces. Secret tears still flow.. But I’m looking forward to that one day that I can finally say I’M OVER YOU and stand next to you without even wanting to hold your hand………

I Can’t Say Goodbye to You

you say it would be better
if we stopped seeing each other
if you had only met me first
when you were free
cause now you’ve got commitment
I should not expect things from you
that you can’t give to me
oh, but baby.. can’t you see

I can’t say goodbye to you
no matter how I tried
you’re such a part of me
without you, I would die
deep, in the heart of me
I know that you and I
were meant to be together
Ican’t tell you goodbye

neither of us planned
that we would fall in love this way
but since we did
why should we be apart
sometimes, some things happen
that can never be explained
now, it’s too late for me
I’ve already given you my heart

I can’t say goodbye to you
no matter how I tried
you’re such a part of me
without you, I would die
deep, in the heart of me
I know that you and I
were meant to be together
I can’t tell you goodbye

who knows why we choose
when we choose the ones we love
who knows why we do the things
we do when we’re in love
I know that you’re a decent man
and you try to do what’s best
but how can I forget
all the feelings we have shared

(you and I were meant to be, forever)
I can’t tell you goodbye……..

>>> When You Leave Please Don’t Say Goodbye <<<

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